


Do the Do

by mywritingbox



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2019-01-09 11:35:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12275646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mywritingbox/pseuds/mywritingbox
Summary: Rhysand taking care of your ridiculously drunk self.





	Do the Do

“She’s been screaming really cheerily at everyone for the past 20 minutes. I figured it was time to call you in.” Azriel mumbled, his lip twitching as you started wiggling your body around on the dance floor of Rita’s. Rhysand’s eyes found you in the crowd as you paused your wiggling to take another shot and promptly went back to dancing. **  
**

You were drunk. Very, very drunk. It had been a good day; all your work was done, no disasters had happened and everyone was safe and sound. So you celebrated.

Or as Mor would usually say, “It’s Friday night, why not get fucked up?”

So that’s exactly what you guys were doing. Getting fucked up drunk at the usual spot with Azriel cataloging all of the embarrassing moments in his memory and Amren refusing to participate on principle claiming that you were all a bunch of idiots.

Rhysand sighed next to Azriel, his eyes following your every move.

“Whose idea was it?”

“Same as always. The dynamic duo of disaster.” Azriel replied with a grin, jerking his chin towards Mor and Cassian who were drunkenly cheering you on. “They wanted to see who would be the first to lose. Naturally, they all did.”

“Not surprising.” Rhys mumbled with a snort as he made his way over to you through the crowd. Mor and Cassian cheered upon seeing him but Rhys cut them both off with identical head smacks that they protested and pulled your stumbling body over to him and back towards where Azriel sat, the music less aggressive.

You drunkenly beamed up at him to which he couldn’t help but chuckle.

“BABY, YOU’RE HERE!”

“Yes, I am.” He replied chuckling again, holding onto you gently as you wrapped yourself around his arm, clinging. He kissed the top of your head and poked your cheek. “I came to pick you up.”

“What? Nooooo.” You whined and Rhys rolled his eyes.

“Yeeesss.” He mockingly whined back to which you pouted. “When are you going to learn how much of a lightweight you are and drink responsibly?”

“But it’s Fridayyyyyy.” You said, both pout and whining intensifying. “We always d-drink and w-woo-hoo on Fridayyyyy.”

“Yeah Rhys, we always drink and woohoo on Fridays.” Azriel pitched in, holding back his grin as Rhys gave him a dirty look. “Let the lady live.”

“Shut it, you.”

Azriel sniggered as you attempted to pull away from Rhys, pulling at your shirt.

“I’m h-hot. I want to t-take off my clothes.”

“Not here, you’re not.” Rhys replied, gently bringing you back to his chest as you protested.

“But but – I’m h-hot! And I want to d-dance!” you whined further then straightened with wide eyes. “I know!” You hiccuped then giggled. “Let’s  _both_  take off our c-clothes and dance!”

“Oh, that’s a great idea. You guys should do it.” Azriel agreed and Rhysand gave him another look.

You grabbed your mate’s face and pulled him closely, whispering. “You’d look so hot n-naked, baby.” Rhys snorted as you started wiggling your eyebrows at him then hiccuped again, letting go of his face. “Let’s get n-naked and DANCE!”

Azriel choked on his drink, trying not to laugh as you started wiggling your body against Rhys and pulling at  _his_  shirt now, singing an off-tune song. His lips twitched, trying really hard not to laugh.

“Sweetheart, not here.”

“Gunna get naked and do the d-do.”

“Darling, I really –”

“Gunna get n-naked and get some d-dick!” A hiccup followed this line, then a giggle as Rhys stared at you, both highly entertained and exasperated.

“I think that’s enough now, babe.” He said amused, watching you bounce about. You just had to be one of the overly energetic drunks.

“Gunna get N-NAKED AND GET S-SOME HIGH LORD D-DICK TONIGHT.”

“Damn right, you are!” Azriel cheered on then doubled over laughing as Rhysand gave him a glare.

You pumped both fists in the air and swayed slightly then screamed, “YEAH I AM.”

“That’s the spirit!” Azriel agreed and you leaned over to the Spymaster while Rhys watched you, letting out another sigh.  

“Hey Az.”

“Yes?”

“Az.”

“Yes?”

“Oh my gods, Az!”

“Yes?”

“You put the ass in Assssriel, Az.” you slurred and then promptly broke out in giggles as Rhysand gave you a flat expression. Azriel looked at Rhys, his lips twitching again.

“Thank you.” he replied and you giggled. “What about Rhys? What do you think of his ass?”

“Hmmmmmmm.” you hummed, making a show of trying to put your finger on your chin to think and missing the first two attempts before actually settling it on your chin, causing more snorts from the two boys. “His ass…is a w-work of art.”

“Oh yeah?”  Azriel questioned, grinning at his brother.

“AND IT’S ALL MINE!”

“You go girl.”

“GO ME!”

“Like she needs any encouraging.” Rhysand mumbled next to his friend as you danced offbeat next to them. He really needed to make sure you limited your drinks. “You’re worse than the other two.”

“I can’t wait to tell her all about this in vivid details at lunch tomorrow.” Azriel said, smirking and Rhysand gave  _him_  the exasperated look now.

“I’m glad you’re such a great friend.”

“Even better, we’ll skip lunch so I can tell Cassian and Mor all about it then have them act it out at dinner instead.”

Rhys shook his head but couldn’t stop his chuckle. That would indeed be a sight to see. He watched you as you swayed some more and as much as he knew you’d be mortified seeing yourself like this, he loved how carefree you looked. It delighted him to no end.

When he caught your eye, he walked over and finally scooped you up.

“Alright, I think we’re done here.”

You whined loudly and made a show of flailing your legs. “But — but the p-party!”

“Don’t you want to get naked and dance?” He asked you with a smirk and you paused your tantrum to nod quickly with a grin and a hiccup. “Alright then.”

Azriel chuckled as you waved cheerily over Rhysand’s shoulder and your words slurred as you yelled out, “BYE AZ WITH THE F-FINE ASS!”

Rhysand turned to find his friend laughing and gave him a knowing look. “Make sure Mor gets the exact shrill in her tone when she’s reenacting this out tomorrow.”

Azriel laughed softly and nodded, waving his drink at the two of you as Rhysand stepped out of the place and winnowed inside your shared bedroom in the townhouse.

“Whoa!” you gasped with wide eyes. “Like magic!”

Rhysand chuckled. “Remind me to accompany you next time you plan to go to one of your drinking parties.”

“Aye aye captain!” you replied and he snorted when you tried to salute and ended up poking yourself in the eye with a whine. He placed you down gently on the bed and kissed the top of your head, both of your eyelids, then your nose.

“I feel betrayed, you wiggling out there without me.” he whined playfully, a glass of water materializing in his hand.

“You s-should’ve just gotten nakkkkeeeddd there.” you slurred, giving him what you thought was a seductive look.

It wasn’t.

“You would’ve been a s-showstopper baby.”

He laughed. “Next time, then. We’ll be showstoppers together.”

Rhys watched you lay down on the bed, humming to yourself and getting comfortable before quickly realizing with an outrage at how fully dressed you were. Letting out a huff, you stumbled out of bed and peeled everything off, swaying with a giggle as the cool breeze filtering through the window caressed your body. This was Rhysand’s favorite part.

He watched you in all your naked glory and it was unbelieveable how lucky he was to have you. Normally, nobody would catch you this carefree. Sober, you were one of the most composed people he had the pleasure of meeting. Still hilarious and fun but never this unfiltered unless drunk and he cherished every moment of it. He couldn’t stop grinning as he observed you.

Wiggling to music only you could hear in your head, you started dancing around the room then promptly tossed yourself on the bed, giggling obnoxiously. Rhysand had just stood by the bed, waiting until you were done your dancing number before moving to sit next to you, laughing softly.

“You’ve really enjoyed yourself tonight, haven’t you?” he asked, handing you the water that you so greedily chugged.

You smacked your lips, handing him the empty glass to put on the night table next to you before wiggling down further on the soft sheets and grinning up at him.

“Mmmm. Yes.” you answered and he smiled down at you as you grabbed both of his hands and placed them on top of your breasts. “But I still wanna d-do the do.”

Rhysand tilted his head back and let out a hearty laugh and despite being drunk beyond comprehension, the sight was the most beautiful that you’d ever seen. You broke out in a fit of giggles as you once again cupped his face and pulled it down to kiss him deeply. He smiled against your lips and lightly nipped, bringing his hands down from your chest to settle on your waist,  before pulling back and staring at you adoringly.

“I love you, you crazy girl.” he whispered softly and you grinned.

“I love you too.” you replied then gave him a playful look. “But you should take off your clothes.”

He smirked at you then shook his head, opting instead to magically switch his outfit to sleeping clothes. He may prefer to sleep naked but not tonight, just to bug you. Rhys moved to lay down next to you and used one hand to prop himself on his elbow and the other to trace lazy circles on your stomach. “No, I don’t think so.”

You frowned. “But I want to – get some d-dick.”

He laughed again at how adorably upset his denial made you. “Not when you’re drunk.” he replied, giving you a wink, his finger now circling softly around your breast. “You’ve been a naughty girl. I can’t just give you what you want.”

You hiccuped and shook your head, pouting. His fingers should be way lower. “B-but I haven’t even told you all the naughty things in my h-head yet.”

Rhysand let his fingers gently glide down the valley of your breasts to your stomach again. “Oh?” he asked, a wicked grin on his face as his fingers danced on your pelvis area, sliding to your thighs and back up, avoiding the area you really wanted him to touch. “What kind of naughty thoughts?”

You turned your naked body so that it could press against his annoyingly clothed one, bringing his hand around to rest on your ass. Rhys affectionately pinched it and you whined softly, earning a chuckle from him.

“I want…” you began, draping your arm around his waist and nuzzling into his broad chest as his fingers rubbed soothing circles on your back. Your eyes were traitorously starting to droop. “I want…you to…”

“What do you want me to do, my little minx?” he purred softly in your ear and you sighed in content. He was putting you to sleep and you could barely fight him.

“I want to do the do with you.” you whispered and giggled ridiculously again causing Rhys to laugh once more.

“You’re incredibly silly tonight, darling.” He whispered to you, his hand lifting your chin so that you could meet his eyes. He kissed your lips softly. “As much as I like to see you let loose, no more wild drinking for you without me.”

You pouted and he leaned to give you another kiss with a smile. “On o-one condition.” you slurred sleepily, nuzzling back into his chest.

“We do the do tomorrow?” he asked and you could hear the grin in his voice.

“Multiple times.”

“Oh definitely.”

“In m-multiple places.”

“Of course.”

“For alllllll of Velarias to hear us.” you singsonged and then giggled when Rhysand kissed the top of your head.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” he replied and his smile was dazzling, content to listen to your drunk nonsense for as long as he lived. Silence washed over the room as you both started to drift to sleep and it wasn’t until Rhysand had almost lost his consciousness that you spoke up again.

“Hey Rhys.” you whispered.

  
“Mm?”

“Rhys.”

“Yes?”

“We’re gunna do the do tomorrow.” you whispered giddily and you felt Rhys’s amused chuckle.

“I know.”

“I’m so excited.”

“So am I.”

Rhysand smiled and his smiled stayed on his lips as he waited for your breaths to even out, indicating you had finally succumbed to your drunk exhaustion. His hands pulled the sheets around the two of you and let his magic refill the water glass on the night stand and materialized a bowl to rest next to it.

The only do you would be doing tomorrow is emptying your guts out. And despite that and despite how horrible you would be feeling tomorrow when you woke up, Rhysand grinned. He would be there through it all and was already planning how to make you feel better.

He was definitely going to do the do with you. He’ll make it last all day then all night long.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is always welcome :)


End file.
